Traditional Sindhi wedding is a lavish
affair and is full of traditions and colorful customs. Sindhis go in
for arranged marriages and take help of the third party
negotiations. Utmost care is taken to match the status of the two
families. A priest decides date of the wedding after matching the
horoscopes of the prospective bride and the groom. In a number of
cases, when the auspicious time to get married cannot be fixed
astronomically, a Gudhuro marriage is performed, which can be
performed on any day after sunset. Given here is a description of
the essential features of a typical Sindhi Wedding ceremony.
Pre-Wedding Rituals:
Some very unique and interesting pre-wedding customs are followed
in a Sindhi wedding.
- Kuchcha Shagun or Kachchi Misri:
Kachchi Misri is the first formal ceremony that takes
place after both the families approve of the match. In this, the
girl/boy is given mishri and coconut to signify that she/he is
the one who belongs to the other family. This is called Kuchcha
Shagun or Kachchi Misri.
- Pakki Mishri: Pakki
Mishri or the formal engagement ceremony takes place a week
before the wedding. In this ceremony, the boy and the girl
exchange rings. A get together of family members and close
friends is also organized to mark the joyous occasion.
- Dev Bithana: This
ceremony is takes place a few days prior to the wedding and is
the starting point of the wedding celebrations. A priest
installs a chakki (stone grinder) as a totemic deity, which is
worshipped till the end of marriage ceremonies. Dev Bithana
takes place separately in the houses of the bride and the groom.
Dev Bithana marks the beginning of the period during which the
neither bride not and the groom is allowed to leave his/her
house. Ainars (marriage guards) look after the requirements of
the bride and the groom and assist them at every step till the
marriage is over. The brothers- in-law of the groom and the
bride are, respectively, appointed as Ainars.
- Lada: Lada marks the
beginning of marriage preparations in the groom's house. The
groom's family holds a ceremonial singing session of traditional
wedding songs. Ladas are sung to the beat of a dholak (drum) or
a plain thaali (metal plate). The family of the groom invites
the neighborhood women to participate in the function. There is
a lot of dancing also.
- Berana: Berana is a
satsang that is organized in the name of the Sindhi God,
Jhulelal ten days before the wedding. Berana signifies the start
of the ceremonies for the forthcoming wedding.
- Mehendi: In a Mehendi
ceremony, the girl's hands and feet are adorned with artistic
mehendi patterns. At this time the women in the family get
together, play music. Folk songs are also sung on this day. On
this day is the Wanwas. In this the girl and the boy are asked
to wear their old clothes, which are torn and discarded once the
ceremony is over. These clothes are then wrapped into a bag and
thrown into the sea/river. This is symbolic of doing away with
the old for bringing in the new and warding off evil.
- Santh: In a 'Santh'
ceremony seven married women put oil on the girl's head. It is
performed the night before the wedding. The bride is then asked
to break the cover of an earthen pot placed before her in a go.
If she succeeds, it is considered to be a good sign. This
ceremony is also performed on the groom at his place.
- Ladies Sangeet Party: Like
the bachelor party hosted by the groom's side there is a party
which the bride gives her girlfriends as a maiden called the
ladies sangeet. In this womenfolk regale themselves by singing
tradition wedding songs and dancing on them.
- Saagri: The Saagri or
the ceremony of showering of the bride with flowers is performed
on the same evening. The groom's married sisters, cousins and
the small children from his side go to the bride's place with
the jewelry made of mogra. The sisters dress the bride in a silk
saree and then adorn her with the flower jewelry. Later, in the
night, the groom visits the bride's house where he is showered
with garlands. A feast is held for the family. This ceremony
signifies the blessings, which are showered on the bride in the
form of flowers.
- Ghari Puja: This
interesting ceremony is carried out in the respective homes of
the bride and the groom. The priest performs the prayers and
married ladies grind wheat on a small old-fashioned grinder
symbolizing that the home will always be prosperous. The groom
offers a handful of grains to the priest indicating he will
always give to charity and look after those less fortunate. The
mothers of both the bride and groom dress up in their bridal
finery. Carrying an earthen pot of water on their heads, they
walk to the threshold of their homes. The sons-in-law of the
respective families cut the water with a knife to ward off any
evil spirits. Friends and relatives adorn the parents with
garlands of flowers and money.
- Baraat: As is customary
in Hindu marriages, the groom wears a sehra or a crown and then
sits on the mare. The groom's mother holds the lamp lit for the
household deity. Amidst singing of ceremonial wedding songs, the
womenfolk make oblations of grain to the crown. A band of
musicians accompanies the baraat amidst singing and dancing.
- Swaagat: When the
baraat reaches the wedding venue, the family of the bride
welcomes the groom's procession with garlands. At this point,
the bride is taken onto the terrace or a window from where she
gazes upon the groom's mukut (crown) but not on his face. The
sisters and brothers of the bride ask the groom to come inside.
The women are welcomed with sindur (vermilion). Their married or
suhagin status is honored with red ribbons or scarves. The
bride's family also gives them gifts, which is usually a sari.
Wedding Rituals:
Given here is a brief description of the Singhi Wedding rituals.
- Paon Dhulai: This
custom is peculiar to Sindhi Wedding. In this the couple is
seated with a screen separating them and thus cannot see each
other. The brother of the bride then washes the feet of the
bride and the groom in a bronze thaali with raw milk. The priest
measures the feet of both the groom and the bride with a thread
kept by the bride.
- Jaimala: Then comes
Jaimala where the bride and the groom face each other and
exchange garlands.
- Hathialo: In this
unique ceremony, the corner of the bride's sari is tied to a
scarf, which is worn by the groom. The right hands of the couple
are tied with a thread that has been blessed with religious
incantations. The tying of the hands signifies an eternal bond
that will join them forever. The couple then prays to the Gods
to give them strength and bless their union.
- The Wedding Ceremony: The
wedding ceremony is performed by the priest in the presence of
family and friends. The bride and groom are seated in front of a
holy fire and the priest recites various religious sayings from
the Holy scriptures. The couple walks around the fire four
times, exchanging vows of duty and love, fidelity, respect and a
fruitful union. The groom then places the brides hand on his
forehead, to denote that he accepts her as his wife for better
of for worse, in health or in sickness and that it his destiny
to marry her.
- Kanya Daan: Just as is
the custom in other Hindu marriages, the bride's parents entrust
their daughter in the safe keeping of the groom and his family.
This is followed by Vidai ceremony, when the bride leaves her
parents house and move towards the groom's house. In Sindhis,
the bride and the groom travel separately on different routes.
Post-Wedding Rituals:
Following are the post-wedding rituals of a traditional Sindhi
Wedding.
- Datar - Welcome for the Bride at
her new house: The arrival of the bride and the groom
is announced by loud beating of drums. At the entrance of their
new home the bride's feet are rinsed by the groom's parents. A
cover is placed over her head as she sprinkles milk in all
corners of the house. The bride picks up a handful of salt and
places it in the hands of her husband. He passes it back into
her hands without spilling any salt, this is done three times.
Similarly, the "datar" is carried out with all members
of the groom's family. Exchanging salt symbolizes that just as
salt blends in and gives taste to food, so must the bride blend
in and become a part of her new family.
- Chhanar: The marriage
is finally considered concluded with Chhanar - the removal of
the Devs (chakki installed as a totemic deity). This is also
known as Dev Uthana.
- Sataurah: Following the
tradition, the bride and the groom go to the bride's house at an
auspicious time fixed by the priest.